Friday, March 04, 2016

News from Switzerland: Böögg is out. Bear poop is in.

Forget groundhogs seeing shadows in Punxsutawney or snowmen being burned to oblivion in Zurich. Bear poop in Goldau is the real deal predictor of spring this year.

Did you get the memo? Bears don’t defecate during hibernation. And they’re the only animals on earth that have this claim to fame.  So the first bear poop of the year is quite the event. Why? Because it signals winter is over. More than an exploding snowman’s head ever could.

So bye bye, Böögg,
So long, Phil.
And hello, Evi.
Evi will tell us when spring is coming.

Evi is a Swiss bear who’s been in hibernation since November at the Nature and Animal Park Goldau. And it’s up to you, Yodelers, to guess that day she will wake up and defecate.

You can do so at www.baereschiss.ch

The Frau is not making this up. Helly Hansen is. In fact, the Helly Hansen Workwear Center’s Winter Clearance sale is going to begin the moment Evi poops—and it includes discounts on winter wear as large as her shit pile. (Excuse The Frau’s French. But it is an official Swiss language.)

Now. The Frau used to be quite amused by Swiss sales, or rather, by the lack of them. She used to look forward to January and July because those were the only months she could buy something Swiss at a discount.

To think: A spring sale is possible in Switzerland, Yodelers! One that depends on a bear to poop out a discount, no less. Wow. And to think The Frau is in the U.S. right now. Sigh. That’s why you, Yodelers, must make up for The Frau’s lack of attendance.

Just think: It’s the best of all possible worlds.  It’s Switzerland both with a sale and a sense of humor.

If you want to show your support for such Swiss sales creativity (and who wouldn’t?), here’s how:

Go to www.baereschiss.ch and enter the date you think Evi will announce it’s spring this year.  Then, make sure to attend the Big Bear Shit Weighing Event (date TBD), which will answer the question: How much discount did the bear defecate?

After that is determined, all shoppers for Helly Hansen winter clothing, whether for work, sport, or leisure, will share the glory of this discount.

Now that’s what The Frau calls a real Swiss deal.

Viel Spass, mitenand.

69 comments:

Kimberly said...

Priceless!

Kimberly said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
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Laura said...

Thanks for the tip! I entered my guess and actually got the day correct. I won a year's membership to the park! I guess I have a newfound talent of prediction.

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Austin_Steven said...

Sind Sie ein Geschäftsmann oder eine Frau? Brauchen Sie Geld, um Ihr eigenes Geschäft zu gründen? Brauchen Sie Darlehen, um Ihre Schulden zu begleichen oder zahlen Sie Ihre Rechnungen oder ein schönes Geschäft beginnen? Brauchen Sie Geld für Ihr Projekt? Wir bieten gesicherte Darlehen von jeder Menge und überall In der Welt (Einzelpersonen, Unternehmen, Immobilien und juristische Personen) in unserer Rate von 3% ausgezeichnet. Für Bewerbungsantworten und um weitere Informationen an die folgende E-Mail-Adresse Jaysonloanfirm@gmail.com zu senden

Unknown said...


Do you need Financial Assistance?
Do you seek funds to pay off credits and debts?
We give out loan with an Interest rate of 1.00%

Please, contact us for more information: PergoCF@gmail.com
Interested applicants should Contact us via email: bayport@safrica.com
Kindly write us back with the loan information;
- Complete Name:
- Loan amount needed:
- Loan Duration:
- Purpose of loan:
- City / Country:
- Telephone:
- How Did You Hear About Us:

Please, contact us for more information: PergoCF@qualityservice.com
Interested applicants should Contact us via email: bayport@safrica.com
Yours Sincerely,
Mrs. Ceren Kelly
PergoCF@aol.com
We look forward to hear from you ASAP.

Unknown said...


Do you need Financial Assistance?
Do you seek funds to pay off credits and debts?
We give out loan with an Interest rate of 1.00%

Please, contact us for more information: PergoCF@gmail.com
Interested applicants should Contact us via email: bayport@safrica.com
Kindly write us back with the loan information;
- Complete Name:
- Loan amount needed:
- Loan Duration:
- Purpose of loan:
- City / Country:
- Telephone:
- How Did You Hear About Us:

Please, contact us for more information: PergoCF@qualityservice.com
Interested applicants should Contact us via email: bayport@safrica.com
Yours Sincerely,
Mrs. Ceren Kelly
PergoCF@aol.com
We look forward to hear from you ASAP.

Unknown said...


Do you need Financial Assistance?
Do you seek funds to pay off credits and debts?
We give out loan with an Interest rate of 1.00%

Please, contact us for more information: PergoCF@gmail.com
Interested applicants should Contact us via email: bayport@safrica.com
Kindly write us back with the loan information;
- Complete Name:
- Loan amount needed:
- Loan Duration:
- Purpose of loan:
- City / Country:
- Telephone:
- How Did You Hear About Us:

Please, contact us for more information: PergoCF@qualityservice.com
Interested applicants should Contact us via email: bayport@safrica.com
Yours Sincerely,
Mrs. Ceren Kelly
PergoCF@aol.com
We look forward to hear from you ASAP.

Unknown said...


Do you need Financial Assistance?
Do you seek funds to pay off credits and debts?
We give out loan with an Interest rate of 1.00%

Please, contact us for more information: PergoCF@gmail.com
Interested applicants should Contact us via email: bayport@safrica.com
Kindly write us back with the loan information;
- Complete Name:
- Loan amount needed:
- Loan Duration:
- Purpose of loan:
- City / Country:
- Telephone:
- How Did You Hear About Us:

Please, contact us for more information: PergoCF@qualityservice.com
Interested applicants should Contact us via email: bayport@safrica.com
Yours Sincerely,
Mrs. Ceren Kelly
PergoCF@aol.com
We look forward to hear from you ASAP.

Unknown said...

Affordable Loan Offer
Do You Need A Business Loan?
Interested applicants should Contact us via email: PergoCF@gmail.com
A Personal Loan? At 1.00%
Name,Amount,Country,Loan Durations,Phone, Mobile:
Please, contact us for more information: PergoCF@qualityservice.com
Interested applicants should Contact us via email: PergoCF@aol.com
Interested applicants should Contact us via email: bayport@safrica.com

Unknown said...

Affordable Loan Offer
Do You Need A Business Loan?
Interested applicants should Contact us via email: PergoCF@gmail.com
A Personal Loan? At 1.00%
Name,Amount,Country,Loan Durations,Phone, Mobile:
Please, contact us for more information: PergoCF@qualityservice.com
Interested applicants should Contact us via email: PergoCF@aol.com
Interested applicants should Contact us via email: bayport@safrica.com

Unknown said...

Affordable Loan Offer
Do You Need A Business Loan?
Interested applicants should Contact us via email: PergoCF@gmail.com
A Personal Loan? At 1.00%
Name,Amount,Country,Loan Durations,Phone, Mobile:
Please, contact us for more information: PergoCF@qualityservice.com
Interested applicants should Contact us via email: PergoCF@aol.com
Interested applicants should Contact us via email: bayport@safrica.com

Do you need Financial Assistance?
Do you seek funds to pay off credits and debts?
We give out loan with an Interest rate of 1.00%

Please, contact us for more information: PergoCF@gmail.com
Interested applicants should Contact us via email: bayport@safrica.com
Kindly write us back with the loan information;
- Complete Name:
- Loan amount needed:
- Loan Duration:
- Purpose of loan:
- City / Country:
- Telephone:
- How Did You Hear About Us:

Please, contact us for more information: PergoCF@qualityservice.com
Interested applicants should Contact us via email: bayport@safrica.com
Yours Sincerely,
Mrs. Ceren Kelly
PergoCF@aol.com
We look forward to hear from you ASAP.

Unknown said...

Affordable Loan Offer
Do You Need A Business Loan?
Interested applicants should Contact us via email: PergoCF@gmail.com
A Personal Loan? At 1.00%
Name,Amount,Country,Loan Durations,Phone, Mobile:
Please, contact us for more information: PergoCF@qualityservice.com
Interested applicants should Contact us via email: PergoCF@aol.com
Interested applicants should Contact us via email: bayport@safrica.com

Do you need Financial Assistance?
Do you seek funds to pay off credits and debts?
We give out loan with an Interest rate of 1.00%

Please, contact us for more information: PergoCF@gmail.com
Interested applicants should Contact us via email: bayport@safrica.com
Kindly write us back with the loan information;
- Complete Name:
- Loan amount needed:
- Loan Duration:
- Purpose of loan:
- City / Country:
- Telephone:
- How Did You Hear About Us:

Please, contact us for more information: PergoCF@qualityservice.com
Interested applicants should Contact us via email: bayport@safrica.com
Yours Sincerely,
Mrs. Ceren Kelly
PergoCF@aol.com
We look forward to hear from you ASAP.

Carson Grant said...

DO YOU NEED A LOAN TO START A BEFITTING NEW YEAR!!!!!!

Are you a business man or woman? Are you in any financial stress? Or do you
need money to start your own business? we offer financial freedom to serious
clients our mission is to help the less financial privileges get back on track

Do you have a low credit score, and you will find it difficult to get loans
from local banks and other financial institutions? solution to your
financial problem is Dr. Carson Grant The Terms and Conditions are very simple
and considerate.You will never regret any thing in this loan transaction because i will
make you smile through out this transaction, because you where not born to be a loser

Email (carsongrantloanhome@gmail.com)
Our services include the following:

* Personal Loans
* Debt consolidation loans
* Possibility
* Business Loans
* Education Loans
* Mortgage
*Refinancing Loans
* Home Loans
*Secure Loans
*Unsecured Loans
*Development Loans.
*Acquisition Loans.
*Blacklisted Loan.
*Construction loans.

We offer loans at 2% interest rate

We offer loans to people in need of financial assistant with a low interest
rate of 2%. In order to get a loan with this company, you can tell the exact amount of
loan you need and the time in which you can pay back the loan.

NOTE: You are required to email us on:(carsongrantloanhome@gmail.com)

Website http://easyloansint.com

Bdsfn Sfcompany said...

Good Day Dear Loan Seeker,

Do you need an urgent financial credit ***? * Very fast and direct transfer to your bank account * Repayment starts eight months after you get the money bank account * Low interest rate of 1% * Long-term repayment (1-30 years) Height * Flexible ***then monthly payment *. How long will it be financed? After submitting the application *** You can expect a preliminary answer less than 24 hours funding in 72-96 hours after receiving the information they need yours.

If you are interested contact us via: bdsfn.com@gmail.com and fill out the below loan application form.

Loan application form:
Full Name:....................
Country:.....................
State:..............
City:..............
Sex:.........................
Phone Number:...........
Loan Amount :...........
Monthly income:..........
Occupation:................... ....
Loan Period:....................... ................
Purpose of Loan:......................... ...........
E-mail address:...................... ................
Have You Applied Before?....................

We awaits your urgent application form to be filled ok. Email Us: (bdsfn.com@gmail.com)

With Best Regards.
Mrs. Pranchment Dura
Emaill Address:bdsfn.com@gmail.com

Unknown said...

GET FAST SECURED AND UNSECURED LOANS
Do You Need A Business Loan?
Do You Need A Business Loan,Or A Personal Loan,At 1.0% If Yes? Name,Amount,Country,Loan Durations,Phone Mobile:Please, Interested applicants should Contact us via email: PergoCF@gmail.com , ( PergoCF@qualityservice.com ) , bayport@safrica.com , ( PergoCF@aol.com )

Unknown said...

GET FAST SECURED AND UNSECURED LOANS
Do You Need A Business Loan?
Do You Need A Business Loan,Or A Personal Loan,At 1.0% If Yes? Name,Amount,Country,Loan Durations,Phone Mobile:Please, Interested applicants should Contact us via email: PergoCF@gmail.com , ( PergoCF@qualityservice.com ) , bayport@safrica.com , ( PergoCF@aol.com )

Geoffrey Graham said...

Hello.

Greetings, i'm Hogg Geoffrey Graham from LA, I am very happy to receive a loan from the European part of the world, they gave me a loan to settle my hospital bills, They saved me from loosing my house. this message might be of help to you guys that also need a loan in other not to go the wrong side in your search you have to contact this company Michael Clinton Loans. Via E_mail: michaelclinton273@gmail.com

Regards.

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