The Frau's Love of English

The Frau loves English. She didn't realize this until six years ago when she moved to a place where Swiss German was spoken. Funny how being surrounded by a foreign language makes you love your own. It's a bit like moving to a desert and realizing, you know, I never really gave water the credit it deserves.

So let's take a moment, fellow yodelers, and give English some praise. Let's celebrate its short words. Its gender neutrality. Its lack of umlauts and accented vowels. Its lack of formal and informal you and instead its embracement of an all-emcompassing, "hey y'all."

That said, there is one thing the Frau loves even more than English. It's English spoken by non-native speakers. 

Oh, the joy that is a misplaced modifier. Oh, the excitement that is unfortunate verb choice. These little language lapses have no end in happiness for the Frau. So imagine her excitement to be in Paris two weeks ago (excitement also because it was her first weekend away from her baby ever and she planned on partying but in reality ended up sleeping) and to find this lovely note near the light switch at her bed and breakfast:

Please, switch of the light and radiators before living.

See what she means. One little Google-translated verb, one big fat laugh for the Frau. 

Anyone else love their native language even more after moving abroad?

Five Great Books About Life Abroad

There are a lot of books about life abroad out there.

But many of them romanticize the experience rather than tell the real truth: life abroad is hard. Contrary to popular belief, the world is not just a place for Westerners to eat, pray, or fix up a holiday home. It can also be a place where a person with a Master’s degree doesn’t even know the word for beef.

Below are five books that paint a more accurate portrait of life abroad when you’re really, really living it for the long haul. If you're looking for a Christmas gift, I recommend any of these. And if you order them by clicking on the links included in this blog, you’ll help support One Big Yodel as well.

Me Talk Pretty One Day

By David Sedaris

Ruthless French teachers. Fears of speaking a new language so strong you wish meat were sold in vending machines. Trying to explain a holiday such as Easter in another language (Jesus shaves, anyone?). In these stories and more, Sedaris pretty much sums up the difficulties (and surprising rewards) that come from trying to make a life in another country. C'est bon.

Undress Me in the Temple of Heaven

By Susan Jane Gilman

A recent college graduate, Susan Jane Gilman was ready to conquer the world. She had romantic visions of backpacking abroad. But then she went to China, which in the 80s, had been open to tourists for about ten minutes. Between ant infested hotel rooms, broken down vehicles, and Chinese men that don’t know a word of English but can recite John Denver songs by heart, Gilman proves that “real travel” doesn’t get much more real than this.

Tales from the Expat Harem

Edited by Anastasia M. Ashman and Jennifer Eaton Goekmen

Before I traveled to Turkey last year, I read this collection of 32 essays about women who live there. One of my favorite essays was about a Christian evangelist from Iowa who was rescued by the very Turkish souls she hoped to save. Gotta love the theme: An American goes out to save the world and the world saves her instead.

Moonlight in Odessa

By Janet Skeslien Charles

What happens when a woman from the Ukraine becomes so tempted by the American dream that she becomes a mail order bride in order to attain it? This novel, written by an American expat living in Paris, has the answers. See the United States through the eyes of a Ukrainian as the main character, Daria, goes from being wide-eyed over things like garage door openers to finally becoming skeptical of the very materialism she dreamed of obtaining.

Kabul Beauty School

By Deborah Rodriguez

This is the true story of an American woman who goes to Afghanistan to teach women how to open their own beauty parlors. But teaching becomes interwoven with living as her students share their stories with her. From the woman who faked her virginity on her wedding night to the 12-year-old bride who was sold to repay family debts, this is an interesting look into the lives of Afghan women and also the affect they have on the American woman who came to empower them.

What are your favorite books about life or travel abroad?

What the French do during lunch

On a typical workday, while Americans are eating a Subway sandwich at their desk, the French are doing this:


They are learning to cook a gourmet meal and then eating their creations (complete with wine and espresso) at different cooking classes across Paris. And then, two hours later, they just head back to the office. C'est normal, n'est-ce pas?

I've come to the conclusion that we as Americans are doing something wrong. You?

When in France...

don't run over their favorite food.

The Cost of Driving in France

Anyone doing a road trip in Europe knows that gas prices are sky-high. For the equivalent of a gallon of gas, one will pay between $6.40 and $7.92 this summer in France. To fill up our little Ford Focus cost an average of 80 EUR ($115) for an entire tank of gas. Can you imagine the outrage if Americans had to pay this much to drive in the U.S.? (And as a side note, this is the one area where Switzerland actually looks cheap. Gas in Switzerland is about $5.88 a gallon. What a deal!)

The other thing the French get you on are the toll roads. To drive from Geneva, Switzerland to Marseille, France on the highway for example, will cost you about 50 EUR ($70) in tolls. I have to hand it to the French though. They're really putting your toll money to work. The one accident we saw only cost us two minutes of time and the French had vans complete with flashing accident signs and also an official "accident woman" waving a red flag in front of the flashing vans in case all of those florescent lights weren't enough.

So you won't waste time due to accidents on French toll roads, but you will waste time at toll booths, spending 20 minutes in line for the honor of paying your 20 Euros for an hour of driving time. These booths are terribly slow, like most things French, and don't always function correctly. One booth we sat in line for rejected all coins put in it, and this caused much strife among the French, some of who were driving horizontally across the highway "parking lot" to find a better functioning booth. It was a mess.

The third way driving is costly in France is because of crazy ratings that make certain little cities (Gordes, Fontaine-de-Vaucluse, Roussillon) believe they are worthy of a big parking charge. The French like to rate their cities with nicknames like "One of the most beautiful" or with flowers instead of stars. A French city with a 4-flower rating will definitely charge you at least 4 EUR for the pleasure of parking on the far end of it.

A French man we met at a B&B in Sault was really upset about all of these parking charges and they are kind of ridiculous. It's this crazy French attitude that "We're beautiful and you will pay." So after paying parking fee after parking fee, my husband and I decided to visit the cities NOT rated as the most beautiful and we were rewarded for our efforts with free parking and fewer tourists. I highly recommend places like Sault, Simiane la Rotonde, and Aurel where beauty and FREE parking abound. That, in my book, is a five-star place to explore.

(It must not be "one of the most beautiful cities" because it has free parking...this is pretty Simiane la Rotonde, a bit off the tourist route and thank goodness.)

Driving in Colmar

When driving near Colmar, France, you'll come across many interesting things:


-A roadside Buffalo Grill complete with a Native American as a mascot.


-Endless "toutes directions" signs, encouraging you that no matter what, you can't be going the wrong way.


-Lady Liberty*, greeting you in the middle of a roundabout. If you can't get enough of the novelty, no problem, just keep circling.

*The Lady Liberty creator, Frédéric Auguste Bartholdi, was born in Colmar, thus the reason for the hulking highway statue.

Another Reason I Love France

For any of you that grew up with a name that was a little less than popular in your home country, maybe you'll understand another reason why I love France: