Why the Swiss love the USA

In honor of 4th of July last week, the Swiss newspaper Blick am Abend featured six reasons why they love the U.S.:

1. Free thinking. Do whatever you want. There's more room for creativity in the U.S.

I agree that the U.S. feels much more open creatively than Switzerland. It's been said that the Swiss are both prisoners and their guards. There is some truth to this.

2. American hot dog.

Can't say I'm very excited about the American hot dog. Give me a slice of deep dish pizza instead.

3. Doggy Bag.

Yes, love the doggy bag concept, although in Switzerland I don't usually have any food on my plate to take home since the portions are much more reasonable (in size, not price). But when I do have leftovers, I would appreciate a doggy bag, especially considering that next plate of Chinese food will set me back at least CHF 25.

4. Dream factory. Home of the stars and anyone who wants to be one.

I think what the Swiss are forgetting here is the concept of competition. It's easy to stand out in Switzerland without being that talented because there aren't that many people to compete against. The U.S. population is 311 million people versus 7 million in Switzerland. So yes, if you make it big in the U.S., you probably make it big worldwide. But the chances of that are like playing the lotto.

5. Music business. The music divas of the U.S. are found on Swiss TV and radio stations like none other in the world.

This actually disappoints me. I wish other countries would play their own music.

6. Smile please. We wish our service was as friendly and happy.

Amen. Would someone in this country please smile and learn that customer service does not involve toll numbers?

What do you think? Do you agree these are reasons to love America?

Say Cheese

Americans are often amazed that Europeans don’t smile.

“Tell me again, really? They don’t ever smile?”

“Not at you,” I reply.

They don’t smile at you because you are a foreigner and you scare them. Because if they give you one little smile, you might give them your entire life story. Come on, you know you would. In English. Without bothering to ask if they understood the language first.

And if Europeans don’t smile on the street, it might also be because it is August, 52 degrees, and raining. They aren’t smiling because they are worried that they might not see the sun again until May. I’ve been there. I live here.

But inside their homes, where they have families and sun lamps, Europeans smile.

Now I’m not saying any of this makes sense, I’m just saying that’s how it is. There are plenty of contradictions in American life too. An American isn’t afraid to reveal their entire life story to a stranger, but they would never bathe topless. Does this make sense either? I don't know. But it makes me smile.

Horrible American Fashions

“Americans are a disgusting people,” said my American husband the other day.

The sad thing is, I had to agree. If you go to the U.S. after living in Europe, you can’t help but cringe. People are fat. People are sloppy. People wear their pajama bottoms in public. (If you don’t believe me, see the above photo, taken in Naperville, IL).

Now I’m all for casual. I like baseball hats. I like sweatpants. And I don’t like the stress of worrying about what I’m going to wear to go to the supermarket. But still. There are limits, both in what should be casual and the amount of food that should be consumed.

To consider the level of casual, take an advertising agency creative director for an example. These people are notorious for taking casual to the limit.

In the U.S., a typical creative director dresses like he’s about 18 even though he’s 45. Baseball hat, untucked T-shirt, shorts, and flip flops or running shoes.

In Switzerland, a typical creative director wears a button down (tucked in), jeans, belt, and leather shoes.

Now be honest. What do you think is more appropriate? Has the American definition of casual been taken too far?

American Tourists in Paris

Whenever I see American tourists in Europe I am always amazed at how bold they are. Yesterday, while sitting on a bench near the Arc de Triomphe in Paris, I overheard an American mother telling her tween daughters, “Now don’t be shy. French boys love to have their photo taken with American girls.”

I’m thinking: Since when? And how is this woman so confident about that?

Then the mother asks the guy sitting on the bench next to me if he wouldn’t mind having his photo taken with her girls. And of course she asks in English. Assuming the guy even speaks it.

“But I’m not French,” he says, obviously having listened to their earlier conversation like I had.

“Doesn’t matter,” the mother says, pushing her girls to stand next to him.

“I’m from Denmark,” the guy protests in perfect English. Then he stands and smiles with her girls.

The mother takes the photo.

“We’re from California and we’re heading to Euro Disney tomorrow,” she says, like he would care.

“It’s a lot smaller than the one in Florida,” says the Danish guy, “I’ve been to both.”

Danish guys are really nice.

But I still wish these kinds of American tourists would go home and stop assuming the world loves their presence. They are an embarrassment to the rest of us who know better.

Watching America Fall from Afar

This morning when I came into work, a German employee greeted me with,

“Well, America’s really fallen apart now."

He is right. While I love my country and often try to stand up for my country, I can’t today. I am not proud to be an American right now.

It is a very sad thing, to not be excited about moving back to your country. But now, even though we miss family and friends terribly, we are looking at an opportunity to stay in Europe until 2011. And we really, how can we say no?

If we move back now, we won’t have time to recoup the money we were saving for a house. If we move back now, we’ll be subject to possibly another Republican White House. If we move back now, we’ll only be paid in dollars. The horror. At this point, airline miles might be better payment.

To depress me further, I watched the Couric/Palin interviews and compared them with the Saturday Night Live skit. It was hard to tell them apart. But the worst part was, to watch them online via the Huffington Post, I had to sit through a commercial.

This commercial was for the Discover Card. The voice-over said, “America is a country of consumerism. And that’s ok. Because there are so many great things to buy.” (Or something to that effect).

Wow. I mean really.

It’s time to take that commercial off the air, the internet or wherever else it runs. America’s in financial crisis and all we get preached to is to buy more on credit? America’s debt, country and individual is embarrassing and we don’t need commercials like this trying to make it worse. I have to say, I think credit card commercials should be as illegal as smoking commercials. They’re both killing us in different ways.

Sorry to be pessimistic right now, more happy things to come about our weekend in Paris. Perfect weather. Smoke free cafes. And Monet’s garden that was still overflowing with flowers even in late September. Yes, it’s easy to get caught up in the gloom, even from afar, but luckily there are still beautiful things in life. One of them being the ballot I have in my hand right now. It’s definitely time to vote from abroad.