Learn to Play the Alphorn on Horn Mountain

Yodelers, it’s that time of year again—time for alphorn camp, that is. 

So stop putting off learning the Swiss national instrument and start spending your first weekend in July attending Fritz Frautschi’s short beginner’s alphorn class in the most appropriately named alphorn-learning location in Switzerland—the Horn Mountain.

Not far from Gstaad, the Hornberg is your stage, the cows are your audience, and the Hotel Restaurant Hornfluh is your après-horn, serving you that well-earned drink after a hard day of practice.

Fritz Frautschi founded the Swiss Alphorn School over twenty years ago and offers courses in the Bernese Oberland. He credits the popularity of his alphorn classes with people’s desire to get back to nature. Unfortunately, learning to blow one of the world’s largest wind instruments isn’t so natural. The alphorn is 3.5 meters long and has no finger holes, tubes, or valves, so all note variations are controlled by the speed and force of your lip vibrations on the mouthpiece. According to one student, the more you kiss your spouse, the easier blowing the alphorn becomes.

It’s much easier to learn the alphorn if you’ve previously played an instrument like the tuba or trumpet. But regardless of your musical experience, Frautschi prioritizes teaching you how to make a lovely sound—which is great, because a beginner playing the alphorn often produces a sound that resembles a dying cow. 

Speaking of cows, the alphorn attracts them. Play a few notes (good or bad) and cattle come calling. The alphorn is how the farmers bring their herds home and how you, the non-farmer, can entice an unintentional but very committed audience. Tourists may flock to you as well. And if The Frau’s experience counts for anything, you don’t have to be a master player to get a following.

As well as attracting cows and tourists, the alphorn also inspires Swiss conversation. The instrument’s history may have a lot to do with this; besides bringing the cows home, the alphorn was also used to communicate with fellow herdsmen across many valleys.

The Frau once called the alphorn “Switzerland’s secret social networking tool” because all the normal cultural formalities that apply in Switzerland are set aside if you carry an alphorn. Fellow alphorn players, strangers or not, are always on first-name terms with each other. So if you’ve always wanted to get to know a particular Swiss person better, now you know what to do.

Come home from alphorn camp and play the Swiss national instrument on a city street, and you will have discovered the key to Swiss culture (and perhaps a nice source of income).

For more information:

Weekend Alphorn Course on Horn Mountain: June 30-July 2, 2017.

Price per person: CHF 450

P.S. You can enjoy 98.9 more ideas like this in The Frau’s new Swiss travel book, 99.9 Ways to Travel Switzerland Like a Local.

New Book Lets You Travel Switzerland Like a Local. (Even if you are one.)

Grüezi People Who Are Cool Enough to Still Read This Blog,

Your involvement in this ultra-exclusive portion of the Internet has gotten even better. Because you, mitenand, are some of the very first to know that there’s a new book coming from yours truly. And it will be available next week.

Almost hot off the presses, 99.9 Ways to Travel Switzerland Like a Local is one part travel book, one part culture guide, and total bucket list enjoyment. 

Coming Soon

It allows you to say adieu to Lucerne and allegra to the place the Swiss voted most beautiful. It encourages you to cut the Swiss army knife from your shopping list and replace it with a rubber messenger bag. And it gives you the inspiration you need to stop following umbrella-toting tour guides (or books that act like them) and start following 320,000 well-dressed Swiss cows instead.

Whether you’re a vacationer rethinking your version of touring, an expatriate who wants to get to know your adopted country on a deeper level, or even if you’re Swiss—99.9 Ways to Travel Switzerland Like a Local is for anyone who believes that the best travel stories come from a desire not just to take a snapshot of a place from a train window, but to stop, smile, and disembark for a while in order to bring the meaning of that blurry photo into sharper focus.

To promote this new book, The Frau will make special appearances in Switzerland next month. Mark your calendars, mitenand, as she would love to see you at one of the following:

The Zurich Writers Workshop May 14, 2:30 p.m. (The Frau will join other authors to discuss how to build a writing career.)

The American International Club of Zurich TGIF, May 19, 6:30 p.m. (The Frau will discuss American life after Switzerland (scary!), the benefits of traveling like a local, and host a quiz—with a book prize—to see who already travels Swisser than the Swiss.)

Global Book Fair May 20, 10 a.m.-2 p.m. (The Frau will read a story to children and discuss some "Swisser than the Swiss" activities for families.)

Until next week, Yodelers, when the shameless self-promotion continues.

LG,

The Frau

P.S. Join The Frau's mailing list and be the first to know when the book is available.

We are All Foreigners in America Today

Yodelers: Happy New Year. Today’s your last chance to party with the elites in Davos. Luckily you can still party like one at any time of year—especially if Davos is practically in your backyard like it must be for many of you. To see Davos as world leaders do, Yours Truly put together some tips for CNN Business Traveller on this Switzerland travel opportunity that you can read here.

Speaking of world leaders, The Frau has never woken up the night before an American presidential inauguration feeling physically sick. She only has one word for that. Sad!

But in all seriousness, she is truly frightened for her country right now. The only thing that gives her hope is that the majority of Americans did not vote for this buffoon and that the majority seem to be stepping up to prove it tomorrow at the women’s marches across the nation. There is even a march in Geneva, Switzerland, Yodelers. All of this makes The Frau feel better.

This recent (and upcoming) American strangeness also makes The Frau feel less like a foreigner in her own country than she did after moving back two years ago from Switzerland. When over half your country also seems confounded by its bizarre direction it makes the last stages of repatriation a little easier somehow. 

Together, we are all foreigners in America these days. (This phenomenon is also making one of The Frau’s next book projects, American Life: 30 Things I Wish I’d Known, an even more interesting thing to write than she ever expected. Hopefully, that book will be ready in 2018.)

Well, here we go, America. Keep The Frau in your thoughts, Switzerland.

America's Little Switzerland. Really.

Grüezi, People.

The Chalet Landhaus Inn

The Frau recently went back to her Swiss home away from home, New Glarus, Wisconsin, for a very good reason—to participate in her first-ever triathlon.

But this was not just any triathlon, mitenand. This was the Alphornman Triathlon. So how could she not participate?

The race began with three men playing alphorns. The race ended with a four-hour Volksfest concert featuring Swiss choirs, Swiss music, Fahnenschwingen with alphorn accompaniment, and a few Wilhelm Tell Guild remarks in Tell Shooting Park. The festival even featured a group from Switzerland itself, the Jodelchörli Alpsteinblick Abtwil.

Volksfest in Tell Shooting Park, New Glarus, WI

The Frau spoke German with a couple of the men from the Swiss group and English with a couple of the people from the New Glarus groups. She fit right in with her strange American Swissness, right there in her own country. The entire weekend was wonderful. The Frau highly recommends a visit to New Glarus for those who feel at home in both Swiss and American culture.

The thing that is great about New Glarus (besides the chalets and cheese options) is that you can come, park your big, fat American car that you really hate being required to have, and not move said car for an entire weekend. The whole town is walkable, there’s a bike path that runs through it, and the Frau’s favorite new restaurant, Sugar River Pizza, is a two-minute walk from the Chalet Landhaus Inn—even with a certain four-year-old taking her time.

Room with a perfect view. If you're The Frau.

In fact, The Frau had such a nice long weekend in New Glarus for the second time this year, that she is going for a third time soon. To do another triathlon. She’s now addicted to both New Glarus and triathlons. C'est la vie, mitenand.

Go to Switzerland Without Leaving America. Really.

The Frau learned something recently:

This is America, Yodelers.

   









Insert moment of silence.

Don't worry, The Frau is still trying to believe this is America too. 

Fondue. Roesti. Ticino Pizzeria. Chalets. Restaurant doors that say Eingang. Hiking paths. Someone walking a Bernese mountain dog. A shop owner from Thun. Raclette cheese store. Emmi cheeses. Edelweiss Hemds. Swiss German speakers attempting to have a Ruhezeit in a hotel pool/whirlpool area where there is no Ruhezeit. The list goes on and on.

So. If you're in America and you're homesick for Switzerland, Wisconsin has a solution for that. It's called New Glarus. And when it calls itself "America's Little Switzerland," it's not kidding. There's a reason the Swiss Club of Chicago comes here at least three times a year. The place even has a race called the Alphorn Man Triathlon. The Frau will be doing this if only to get the t-shirt.

Real live Swiss people came to New Glarus over 150 years ago. Some, like Esther, who runs a European import store, came 30 years ago. Swissness lives on.

The other hot spot for Swissness is Monroe, Wisconsin, about 18 miles from New Glarus. This place has cheese. Real cheese. Emmi's only North American plant is here. And it has a shop onsite called Alp and Dell. This shop even sells Swiss wine. That's how Swiss it is.

Why are you still reading this? Go, go, go to New Glarus and Monroe now and enjoy all the Swissness America has to offer only 4,444 miles from Switzerland (to be exact).

5 Great Places to go with Kids in Switzerland

Need a few ideas for what to do with your kids in Switzerland? Look no further. The Frau (and Toddler M) have done some investigating for you.

Technorama (Winterthur)

This Swiss science museum has something for everyone—even Toddler M enjoyed a full day there banging drums, watching electric trains, and making gigantic bubbles. Spread across many floors, The Frau was pleasantly surprised by its non-Swiss size.

Tip: When traveling by public transport, be sure to get the RailAway offer, which will save you 10% on both the entrance fee and the transport there. They also accept payment in REKA.

Paradisimo (Pfäffikon SZ)

BMW Bobby Car. Only in Switzerland.

This is possibly Switzerland’s most perfect indoor playground. Why? It’s inexpensive, it has separate play areas for babies versus older kids, and there is a cafe with Wi-Fi for parents. And oh, the Bobby Cars are BMWs. It wouldn’t be a Swiss experience otherwise.

Children’s Museum (Baden)

The perfect balance of toys and exhibit make this place a fun day out for more than just children. Think dollhouses from the last century, a room filled with puppet shows you can put on a play with, and an entire floor of wooden games to explore.

Tip: They accept REKA checks.

Transport Museum (Lucerne)

Climb on trams. Ride scooters. Watch cars from the decades go by. The Transport Museum is all about transporting you to, well, the world of transport.

Tip: RailAway will save you 10% off the admission and the train ride there.

Emmentaler Schaukäserei (Affoltern i.E.)

Emmentaler cheese (that’s Swiss cheese for all you Americans)—comes from here. At the Emmentaler Schaukäserei, you can visit the dairy, eat at the restaurant, shop for cheese, and let your kids play on the playground and admire the statues of cows. You can also combine a visit to the Schaukäserei with a beautiful stroller hike through the rolling hills. Start in Lueg and follow the signs from Lueg-Junkholz-Schnabel-Affoltern i.E. (3.5 km).

Anyone else have tips for having fun in Switzerland with kids?

Enjoy reading about Swiss life? Then you might enjoy The Frau’s new book, Swiss Life: 30 Things I Wish I’d Known. It even has a section on Mutterhood. Available at fine online retailers and on Zurich’s most famous shopping street too (Bahnhofstrasse 70).

What to do when it rains in Switzerland

As some yodelers may or may not have realized by now, Zurich gets more rain than London. So what should you do in Switzerland when it rains and pours? Don’t be like The Frau and get stuck at a Swiss museum the size of a closet with an admission price as big as an American mall. Instead, go to the following places that suck less than rain. Ten free tickets to one of them will encourage you to get out, so keep reading for how to win.

Designer Outlet in Landquart

Feel like shopping for deals in a country that doesn’t usually have any? Then you should head straight to the Designer Outlet in Landquart for bargains on designers from Desigual to Tommy Hilfiger. Warning: This designer outlet mall almost feels American. Key word, almost.

Tinguely Museum in Basel

Can sculptures talk to you? Visit the Tinguely Museum in Basel and find out. Because the machine sculptures of Jean Tinguely aren’t just something to look at—they are something to interact with. Walk in front of one and let it surprise you.

Bad Zurzach Spa

Since the Thermalbad in Baden has been closed for the last few years, The Frau has been forced to bathe in the healing waters elsewhere. But that’s ok because Bad Zurzach has four outdoor pools of various temperatures–one with a lazy river­–plus a great indoor area for babies and small children. To get the best deal via public transport to Bad Zurzach, take advantage of the SBB RailAway offer, which gives you 10% off the spa entry and 20% off the train ride there. (And if you’re cheap like The Frau and pay in REKA, you’ll save another 20%).

Zurich Opera House

The Transport Museum is home to the
largest movie screen in Switzerland.

270 performances at the Zurich Opera House. 209 rainy days per year in Switzerland. Coincidence?

Transport Museum in Lucerne

In a beautiful location on Lake Lucerne, the Swiss Museum of Transport makes a great day trip rain or shine. One of Switzerland’s largest museums, it’s perfect for any age and will transport you from steam engines to modern jets with a scooter ride in between. If that isn’t enough, the museum is also home to the largest movie screen in Switzerland and they have kindly given The Frau ten free tickets to give to her readers for the Penguin Migration movie. To win, just leave a comment within this post and include how many tickets you would like (maximum three per winner). Enter by Tuesday, April 29. Make sure The Frau can find you via your link or other winners will be chosen.