Dear Frau: I’m moving to Switzerland and I have questions

Welcome to another edition of Dear Frau. It's kind of like Dear Abby, but with an international twist. If you have questions about life in Switzerland, don't hesitate to contact the Frau and maybe your little Frage will be in the next edition of Dear Frau.

Dear Frau,

I loved reading your columns. I’m gravitated by your love and positivity of Switzerland and not trying to hold onto all US things and attitude, especially while living there. The majority I have spoken with advised me to take 50+ boxes of Mac & Cheese. My family doesn’t eat that stuff and in the land of cheeses, why not boil some pasta and make a sauce with some local cheese.

I’m an anxious person and I’ve been trying to do as much research as time allows, but I’m going in circles trying to prepare for our move (sell off stuff electronics and stuff won’t use upon our return, decide what to put in long term storage, and what new items to buy all the while trying to prep our house to put on the market) and make decisions around what to send over. Some expats I have spoken with gave me advice about all the US things we can’t get in Switzerland or that may be much more expensive, especially things our kids may need or want. Maybe telling you about myself and my desire would be helpful. 

Moving boxes in The Frau's Swiss apartment

My life can be summed up as a Midwestern mom of two small children desiring a minimalist lifestyle so the family can slow down and enjoy traveling the world. Right now I am living in an oversized home, collecting too many things (I could be a borderline hoarder similar to a mom in the Depression Era because I went from making a great living to becoming a stay at home mom and feel like I have to save money, reduce, reuse and recycle. Also, I’ve never liked being wasteful.), driving a minivan, cleaning all day but have nothing to show for it, and feeling like I have no time for anything. I always thought I would travel the world and be free of material burden and not live like the “Joneses”, pun intended. I want to start fresh and have a real Swiss experience, as I would love to become fluent in French and live like Europeans. 

We’ll be living in a small town between Geneva and Lausanne. From what I gather, it’s the country even though I consider vineyards and a view of Lac Leman and the alps as luxury. We will be living in a smaller modern home, which is completely different from our US style so most of our current furniture won’t fit or work well. Although I desire to become a minimalist, the planner in me wants to have a surplus of items on hand to make my family’s life smoother and calm my fear of not being able to get it until we return to the US for holidays or may have to pay an arm and a leg to ship.

So...that was my novel. Here are my questions:

We will have a 40 ft. container to send our belongings from the US to Switzerland at no cost. What would you send over vs. buying there?

The Frau also was able to send a 40 ft. container from the US to Switzerland at no cost. She sent everything she couldn’t or didn’t want to sell in the US. Because here’s the reality, Yodelers, as The Frau learned—when three years in Switzerland turned into 8.5—you never know where you’re going to go next. Paying to store things when you can ship them for free makes no sense. Were there boxes The Frau shipped that never got opened in 8.5 years? Sadly yes. Are there boxes in her big, fat American basement now that haven’t been opened since she moved “home” 1.5 years ago? Yes. Fact of life and of moving.

What are your recommendations on how to adjust quickly after settling in? I keep 

hearing the ‘wives’ get depressed and miss family once the boxes are unpacked.

Keep busy. Busy is an American thing after all! But The Frau doesn’t mean busy as in busy work, but busy in having a purpose. This could mean anything from finding a job to starting a blog that will document every fountain in the city of Zurich. It could also mean taking a language class or joining a club. Anything to keep you from sitting at home wondering what the heck you just did with your life! 

How do families save money when everything is expensive?

Ok. Here’s the great Switzerland myth, and one that The Frau has written about for the Wall Street Journal if you want more info. Yes, Switzerland is expensive. But the salaries are also some of the highest in the world. The Swiss have enormous purchasing power both at home and abroad. Everyone should be so lucky.

Look. This is a cliché every Swiss brand wants you to believe—but in general, you do get what you pay for. Swiss trains are expensive, for example, but they also provide timely, efficient service and crisscross the entire country, which is more than any American train service can claim. The extra few francs are well worth it and won’t affect those making Swiss salaries.

Some things in Switzerland are amazing values—these include public swimming pools, ice rinks, nature playgroups for toddlers, Swiss produce (try to find a tomato that actually tastes like a tomato in the U.S.—you can’t find this at any price in a grocery store).

Most people who move to Switzerland are surprised at how much money they end up saving.

Tips on grocery shopping and cooking? I realize food prices are high and the kitchen

appliances are smaller. The refrigerator in our new house is almost the size of a 

college dorm fridge. 

As an American in Switzerland, you have to change how you shop. Grocery shopping is an almost daily event in Switzerland. This is for many reasons—small refrigerators, lack of basements, ability to carry things if you don’t own a car, fresh breads, and the ripeness of produce, which is sold ready to eat and without the preservatives found in American foods. Buy some Swiss strawberries and you’ll be lucky if they last a day before molding.

How did you work around not having the conveniences we have in the states? i.e., 24 

hour grocery and pharmacy, large washer and dryer, giant fridge and deep freeze, 

drive-thru, lots of storage space, etc…

It takes awhile, but you learn to adapt to the new way of life. You have to plan a bit more to make sure, for instance, you have food for Sunday, but you get used to it and then you realize how pointless it is to make retail workers work all night. There’s just no reason for it.

Sharing a washing machine and dryer can be a pain, but you also learn how to deal with that. The Frau never was able to clean the lint from the dryer properly, according to her Swiss neighbor, but that’s just something else she learned to accept.

What type of vehicle(s) do you recommend to accommodate a family of four that’s safe 

and has good resale in 3-5 years? I keep hearing smaller is better. My kids will be 4 

and 2 yrs. when we get there so we still need car seats and a stroller.

The Frau has no idea. Her idea of a good vehicle is no vehicle. The Swiss life allows one to live without a car so that’s what she did. However, she would recommend buying one second-hand from another expat who is leaving the country asap and desperate to sell it. That's probably the best way to get a good deal. Maybe some others can comment on this below?

Are European car seats slim to accommodate smaller vehicles? Is it better to take over US car seats? 

In general, European cars are smaller. US and European car seats have different regulations so they have different models. These are also good things to buy second hand from other expats.

Are European strollers sleeker? If so, where can I purchase one?

The Frau had two strollers. One small, cheap $20 collapsible one from the U.S. for city trips, and one heavy-duty mountain stroller (she bought a TFK model from Germany). She recommends buying strollers in the U.S. or in Germany. Swiss mountain strollers can cost upwards of CHF 2000. Not a joke. The used market for Swiss strollers is insane as well. People want CHF 250-500 for their USED stroller.

How did your family survive the summer heat without air conditioning?

We bought fans and we sweated. Again, you get used to it. It was an excuse to jump into the lake during lunchtime at the office. Everyone from The Frau’s office was at the lake. It was fun. Of course, the heat was less fun when The Frau was pregnant, but now she hates American air conditioning for its wastefulness. Wearing a sweater in the summer is ridiculous too. The Frau learned to live with weather, something Americans don’t do. For example, Swiss children never don’t go out to play—if it’s raining, you dress them in complete rubber outfits. And they play. Outside. Weather is not an excuse not to go out in Switzerland.

I may be interested in working part-time. What’s the best way to find a professional but 

flexible position?

Finding a job is about making connections--no matter where in the world you are looking for one. It’s about who you know, even if at first glance it appears you know no one. Get on LinkedIn and see who you know who knows someone. Ask at your current office if they can connect you to someone in Switzerland—The Frau’s did by sending her resume to NYC and then NYC sent it to someone in Zurich. And that’s how The Frau eventually found her job. Submitting blindly is not the answer. 

And make sure your resume is prepared for Switzerland—which means things like including a photo and your birthdate and nationality at the top. Almost all jobs in Switzerland—from top management to law to engineering can be negotiated for part-time work. It’s one of the best things about working in Switzerland—often you can work as much or as little as you would like but still keep up your career.

I would like our family to travel on weekends within Switzerland and to nearby countries but don’t know where to start. Any advice on where to go and what to see?

Start with the next town over and go from there--that's what The Frau used to do when she had her GA (Swiss Train Pass). Also: The Frau is currently working on a Swiss insider travel guide that will be out (hopefully) next year. But until then, yes, cross big things off your bucket list. The Matterhorn. The Aletsch Glacier. Hike from Preda to Bergün. But also go to the little villages. Find the organic farm store in the middle of nowhere. Sometimes the best travel experiences are the unexpected ones.

Any other advice?

Read this blog. Read other blogs. Read books about Switzerland. Connect with groups on Facebook. The more you know about a place, the easier (and sometimes admitedly harder) it becomes. Enjoy your time as an expat. Accept the Swiss for who they are. You won’t change them—but, as The Frau discovered and wrote about in her book on Switzerland, the Swiss just might change you.

Can you help our Midwestern friend with her questions or do you have a different opinion than The Frau on something? Leave a comment. Vielen Dank, mitenand.

The Frau’s Swiss Love Affair

The longer The Frau lives in Switzerland, the more she realizes how disappointing the rest of the world is going to be if she ever leaves.

Toddler-friendly (and boat-friendly) playground in Twann.

She came to this realization when stepping off the train in Twann on Sunday, only to view the most picturesque playground she has ever seen. It was literally right on Lake Biel. It had picnic tables and sand and a slide that was actually toddler-sized. Trains cut through the vineyards above the park. Bikes rode by next to the park. Ducks quacked. If that weren’t enough, as Toddler M was swinging, a classic Swiss boat pulled up, right next to the playground.

A pristine white boat with a Swiss flag pulled up to the playground. Yes. Even Toddler M had to turn in her swing to take in such a sight.

The day continued all perfect and Switzerland-like from there. A stroller-friendly hike up into the vineyards from Twann to Ligerz and back along the lake. Ice cream. More fun at the park in Twann.

 

Ligerz, Switzerland

It was such a perfect day that Toddler M sang almost the entire train ride back to Baden. American nursery songs. Swiss songs from Krippe. A Swiss woman even hummed along with Toddler M as she sang one of the Swiss songs. Interaction. Yes. It is possible.

Oh yodelers, The Frau sometimes feels like she’s been on an eight-year date with someone that’s too good for her. Someone that her mere American mortal-ness with her messy apartment and geraniums that fail to cascade properly doesn’t deserve.

But it's only a matter of time, yodelers, before something goes wrong that you'll also hear about in this very space. Because like most expats, The Frau has a love-hate affair with her adopted country. It’s only normal, isn’t it? But the love affair days are what make being a foreigner here all worth it. Oder?

Go West, Young Expat

In honor of the 4th of July, The Frau would like to encourage all expats living in Switzerland to go west. To the Emmental.

The Emmental is underrated. Why so, says The Frau?

Because no one goes there.

Gruyère. Zermatt. St. Moritz. The Emmental might as well be in Canton Aargau for the amount of love it gets from expats.

Hiking in Emmental

The Frau has a remedy for this. It’s called the photo on the right. This is the Emmental, yodelers. Get out your alphorns and let the message travel for 18 miles. Because the Emmental put the hole in the cheese us Americans call "Swiss." And therefore we should give it a little more credit in this country.

Emmental has rolling landscapes. It has people who say “Grüezi” in possibly the cutest accent in all of CH. And it’s home to a town called Junkholz. What else could you want?

Don’t believe The Frau? See for yourself. Do her hike (which is stroller friendly people, so there’s no excuse even if you have a baby for not going to the Emmental).

Here’s the 3.5 km hike—which ends at a huge cheese complex. (It's Tipp 7 in the PDF).

For those who need a translation, here it is: Take the train to Burgdorf and the bus to Lueg. Start hiking in Lueg towards Junkholz. Pass Schnabel. End at Affoltern i.E. at a cheese (and admittedly somewhat cheesy) factory. It’s not as extensive as the one in Gruyère, but it’s also not as crowded. There’s a wonderful picnic area, a playground to keep kids (or adults acting like kids) busy, a cheese shop, a restaurant serving everything with a side of cheese, and possibly the oldest cheese making house in the world that can still live up to Swiss cleanliness standards.

Anyone else like the Emmental?

Five Reasons Switzerland is a Great Place to Have a Baby

The Frau has now been Die Mom for over seven months. Naturally, she was incredibly nervous about giving birth in a country where she had to learn the German equivalents for painkiller, cervical dilation, and please no episiotomy. But somehow, everything went smoothly. Somehow, the Frau survived. Somehow, Switzerland delivered by helping the Frau do the same.

You can hike around Lake Lungern with a stroller.

Needless to say, the rumors are true. Switzerland is a great place to have a baby. Here’s why:

One: Affordable care. 

Frustrated with expensive Swiss insurance policies? Have a baby and get your money’s worth. Swiss insurers are required to pay for almost all pregnancy-related doctor and hospital visits. So go ahead—lower your monthly payments and increase your deductible—your normal pregnancy-related check-ups and hospital bill won’t be coming out of it.

Two: Patience. 

Swiss midwives don’t rush you. Most encourage natural birth. But before you run back to the United States and demand a C-section, keep this in mind: a place that encourages natural birth (whether you do it or not) is actually a good thing because it means your labor is cared for with patience, not by people who just want you to hurry so they can go to lunch. Also, after a normal birth, you can stay in a Swiss hospital for up to five days as you recover and learn to care for your baby. You can even leave your baby at the hospital and go out to dinner, which the Frau highly recommends since after you leave the hospital with your new baby, dinner will probably become something you dream about, rather than eat.

Three: Midwives. 

You can have a midwife visit you at home after you return from the hospital. She comes to your house and makes sure you know what you’re doing (because if you’re like the Frau you won’t!). This is all also covered by Swiss insurance, which becomes even more of a blessing if you read books like Baby Catcher, and realize how U.S. insurers have basically made independent midwifery extinct in the United States. Be more prepared than the Frau, and choose your midwife before you give birth. 

Four: Free Money. 

Yes. You are hearing right. Beginning the month your child is born (so aim for the 30th!) you receive a minimum child benefit allowance of CHF 200 ($212) a month, which is added to your paycheck.  Unfortunately the Frau lives in Aargau, where they give you the bare minimum, but still, it helps make up for the fact that diapers and three times as expensive in Switzerland than they are in Germany. Even more amazing? You get your CHF 200 every month until your child turns 16. After your child turns 16, you are entitled to an education allowance of CHF 250 a month until your child is 25. If you’re luckier than the Frau, you also live in a canton that will give you a bonus of CHF 1,000, just for giving birth.

Five: Stroller-accessible Hiking Trails

You may not be able to get to your fourth-floor apartment without a struggle, but the woods? No problem. You’ll be sure to find plenty of stroller-accessible hikes in Switzerland. A few great Frau-tested hikes with strollers include the path around Lake Lungern, the wine trail near Maienfeld, and the wonderful walks included on this blog. Now if only the people riding the SBB/CFF/SSF without kids wouldn’t take up all the spots in the family zone, things would be perfect.

Have you had a baby in Switzerland? What has been good (or bad) about it for you?